A new challenge for me. I'm all for it. I really want to see how far can I reach. I'm really sure from the beginning that I'm totally no match for PeterSatera, this dude is a titan... If I and JRob make it, I would totally do a celebration on Skype immediately.
I gotta try very hard then.
Fear. It's scary. I had night terror a few days ago. It came like a storm. I did not know what I did after waking up, but my brother told me that even my neighbor heard my screams. He told me at a point, I stopped breathing. The amount of stress I'm getting is very high. Work, my father's cancer, my sleeping problem and I'm returning to alcoholic stage. Fuck me. I'm dying slowly.
I hate myself. I don't know if I can pass this contest. And my life. We'll see. @PeterSatera... dude you're awesome and I'm rooting for you. (yeah it's suck to root for the opponent... heh)
I think I should stop trolling people on the forums and be myself again. It's sad that I'm trying to cope with my problem by causing someone else some problem. Perhaps I should focus on people's actual problem and help them for once.
My music career is getting better tho. The ARMA project is very bright, and I was offered to do a 2nd project in near future. My GF works in UofT flim & music faculty and they wanted to hire some experienced composer for some of their projects. So my GF introduced me to them and I got a part time job asap. So they played my music actual on NG and accept my position. Fun time... I'm going to writing music for films with live orchestra and choir bands! Yay.
I guess I finally found myself again. After 15 years... So long. So lost. So lonely.
So... How are you, NG friends?